Learning As I Go: Pregnancy Update 004

Almost at 31 weeks and the burst of energy that I received during the second trimester is slowly fading. Naps are now my best friend. I love them. I wish I was taking one right now instead of writing this post.

So, we found out a month ago that our little girl is currently breech. Frank breech to be exact. This means she is literally folded in half inside me with her feet all the way up by her head. I think that is pretty impressive. Sarah thinks "I am cooking a winner." The doctor is giving her one more month to turn. After that she is pretty convinced it won't happen due to her size. So at that point I will be scheduled for a C-Section, a procedure I got to witness in our last birthing class.

We viewed several videos during the course but this was the only one that we received a warning before it was played. Apparently some people can only handle watching a baby's head being pushed out of a vaginal opening. One of those people is Sarah. She watched some of the video through her fingers when her head wasn't down. I was committed to watch the whole thing with eyes wide open.

First off, let me say, they are not gentle when opening you up. I almost yelled out "Hey, hey...Take it easy!" to the doctors on screen. Is it really necessary to man handle someone's outer layers of skin and muscle tissue so violently? Than after forcefully grabbing the baby's head and ripping it out of the mother, they jam that little suction thing down its throat three to fifty times in a manner that is horrifying. That bothered me more than watching the incision.

What a welcome to the world. Hey there little one...excuse me while I jam a foreign object into your trachea repeatedly. All is full of looooooove....

Learning As I Go: Pregnancy Update 003

Tomorrow I am officially six months pregnant. Pretty crazy to think that there is only 16 weeks left until I am in charge of a new human. I can't believe they let anyone do this.

So a few things have happened since my last post. The wife & I found out we were having a girl during our second trimester screening on Week 19. The tech excitedly pointed out on the screen how she determined this and I just nodded and pretended I saw it too. I would love to go to a few ultrasound tech courses just to see how they can possibly teach someone to distinguish anything of consequence. It was amazing to watch her measure bones and organs that only she could see on the display. She would call each one out and announce the size. Unfortunately it is hard to get too excited when you feel like you might possibly pee yourself at any moment. It is pure torture having to go to these tests with a full bladder, than add the tech pushing and rolling the wand across your pelvis. Fun times.

Now that I am further along I feel much more distinguishable movements like kicks and even hiccups. Sarah felt the very first round of hiccups I experienced, but hasn't gotten a second shot of feeling any movement. I think the baby is messing with her mind, which I find pretty funny. Nothing like an adult getting angry at a fetus.

Learning As I Go: Pregnancy Update 002

Well, I am now 3 days away from week 18 and everything has been going fairly smoothly in the symptoms department. Which is making it very hard for me to bitch and rant, two of my greatest loves. Sure I still pee every hour, but I already brought that up in the first post. So that is old-hat.

One thing worth mentioning, though, is that I am starting to feel the beginnings of movement. It is very subtle most of the time, but surprising nonetheless. Once I shared this with Sarah she was on a mission to have it happen in her presence. We read online that the fetus may react to a flashlight, drinking cold water, or hearing certain music. I confirmed the music tip might be accurate due to the fact I felt a lot of rumbling when I was out and Dropkick Murphy's were being played loudly. Which I thought was pretty bad ass music to cause a fetus to rock out.

Since everything else seemed like fetal harassment, we decided to go the music route. After she played some music on her iPhone near my belly, I had to sadly inform her that the baby was being a jerk and I felt nothing. Which confirms it shares a large chunk of my genetic material. I am so proud.

Learning As I Go: Pregnancy Update 001

I finally have entered the second trimester. It is a big milestone marked with being able to share my pregnancy with the world and also to allow myself to obsessively buy onesies. So clearly the next step for me would be to document this crazy ass science experiment. The complaints, joys, musings ...everything.

So far here is what I have learned and experienced:

I will probably not be fully comfortable at anytime for the remainder of my baby growing state. I guess that goes hand in hand with having a human now residing where your organs were taking up space.

I never knew the true meaning of the word fatigue.

At some point in the day, hell maybe even all day, I will have gas. You have all been warned. I can't do anything about so we all just have to deal.

Peeing is now my new hobby. I am so into it that I even get up 4 to 5 times during the night just to have at it. Sometimes I surprise myself by participating in my new interest at unexpected times, like after a sneeze.

I will get up to complete a task then forget why I got up. This will happen daily. I will also have a conversation and insist parts of it did not occur because I don't remember saying any of what you recall.

During the week I will be angered by nothing and saddened by almost anything.

When your gay and pregnant you will have a lot of conversations about sperm and procedures. Just get used to it or figure out a clever way of changing the subject.