Road Side Memorials

I just don't get road side memorials. I find them creepy. I would much rather visit a dead relative in a nicely manicured graveyard then on the side of Route 80. Also, I have never caught anyone in the act of putting one up. It must be an early morning type of venture, which is all the more reason I wouldn't be involved. If I happen to perish on some stretch of road, I will just insist in my will that I should be cremated and that all my living relatives be forced to wear my ashes in a custom made necklace. You know, something normal.

Halloween Time

I love when Halloween comes around every year because I get to play a memory game while I drive. It all centers around the parasitic nature of Halloween supply stores. A trend which I have noticed in the past several years, probably due to our ever tanking economy. Whenever I see one, I try and remember what failed business once occupied the space. Usually it is an easy answer like Circuit City, but sometimes I have to dig deep. When no one in the car can answer it must have been deserving of its failure and Spirit Halloween's gain.

Doctor's Office

While waiting in the dermatologist's office this morning, my mind started to wander as I stared at a bottle of Aluminum Chloride wondering in what capacity it was used. I noticed how horrible the music being piped into the room was, but then I thought it would be much worse with no music. Waiting in that tiny little room while sitting on a paper lined exam table in complete silence. Nothing to do but stare at the four white walls and various jars of cotton balls and swabs. Right then Terence Trent D'Arby started up with "Wishing Well" and I realized with every pro there is a con. I think I would rather have 10-15 minutes of silence and boredom instead of the following scenario.

*knock, knock*

Doctor: Well the biopsy results are in and unfortunately I have some bad news.

Patient: On no...

Wish me love a wishing well To kiss and tell A wishing well of butterfly tears

Doctor: Yes, I am very sorry. You have a very aggressive form of melanoma. There is nothing we can do.

Do do dooo Do do dooo Do do do da doooooo...

Spring?

Click to play...
[qt:http://cappuccinocowgirls.com/attemptingzen/UPLOADS/Dumb_Robin.m4v 270 360]

As you can tell by my amazing voice over, I stumbled upon my first robin sighting of the year this morning on the way to my car. I think we have to band together and ban all outdoor mirrored objects. It is unfair to these dim-witted creatures. I did try and help the robin, after I filmed it of course. But my presence nor my jingling keys would not deter it from its task. I didn't want to push it and have the story end with me being the victim of a robin attack, so I walked away and let it continue bashing what was left of its small brain.

Binder & Binder

Do you really think your fooling us? Accept your baldness.

Retro

Retro is in, I get it. I am all for the Betty Page look and I am dealing with the resurgance of 80s fashion. But today in New York City I saw a guy in overalls, a kerchief, and a cabbie hat with a large moustache. Come on man, the old timey conducter look will never come back around. You have gone too far.